change and unchanging.

The moon is huge tonight. Lights twinkle in the distance, a dog barking, car engines coming and going, these the background song to the words. This night is still, quiet and sleepy in a way only very full days can be.

Boxes are being packed, one life is ending, left behind in mountains that rise up to touch the face of their Maker. Another life is beginning where the horizon bends down to kiss the water below. Change. It seems to be the only consistent thing in this life. With each item I put away, with every moment that slips through the hour glass, I feel it coming. Though I am not leaving this place that has captured my heart, those who have always been here with me are, and so though I am not the one going, it would seem that my life is tied in and drastically affected by the change wrought in those around me.

I have never really been afraid of having life change. It has conditioned me from a young age to expect that this will happen often. Some changes have been wonderful, some not, but always the tide ebbs out, taking what would seem constant and shifting it even in the slightest of ways. I love that about this sweet and uncertain life, the knowing that things are bound to be different eventually, that even the waiting does not last forever, and that though it may take a bit, things will change. Doesn't always make it easier, but it definitely helps:) I have known what it is to have things shift suddenly, with no warning, just wham. I have felt what it is to have pain engulf me, jerking me up and spinning me around, then sitting me back down to see what it has wrought. I have known joy with no warning as well, having the most wonderful moments catch me by surprise, lifting me up to dance, then sitting me back down to watch the smile spread across my heart. I have known both and I have learned from each in their own way, the depth of my Father's heart.

There have been times, especially in the last few months, when knowing that something had to change eventually is what kept me smiling. Yet, despite knowing that it will all be different, not fearing it comes from knowing beyond the shadow of a doubt that, though everything around me may ebb and flow like the sea, my soul is not cast about by this, but held tight and secure by the hand of a God whose love is never ending, boundless, unchanging, and faithful. He is unchanging. And my heart is His, secure in the knowledge that even if things do not turn out the way I want, He is in control and nothing can shake the confidence found in Him. Which is awesome.

And wow, it's amazing to know that if we are His, our lives can go absolutely crazy around us and yet in the midst of the storm, in His arms, there is security and peace and this amazing crazy love that just can't be understood, but which we feel with every fiber of our being! And this is unchanging. He is unchanging. Man, I'm so thankful for that. I am so thankful to know that I can trust Him with everything. All the changes and craziness and life in all its wild sweetness, it's all His anyway, and beyond all I know or can see, I know who holds my heart and on this rock is where my soul is built.